Redneck's Nest and His Tropical Wife...: SPEAK YOUR PARTNERS LANGUAGE

Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. But!!! If you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all. Words are powerful. They can build up and they can destroy. Who doesn't like to get a compliment? It is uplifting and helps us become a better person. If this is your language, hearing the words I LOVE YOU, means the world to you. Tell him about the qualities you respect about him, acknowledging him for what he is. Tell him what you admire about him, describing the traits you desire about your spouse. It makes my heart skip when he tells everyone how lucky and proud he is to have me. It makes my love tank full.

Quality Time

We say all the time: Life is short. Nothing says I love you, than a full undivided attention. For a fast paced country like U.S., where couples both have their own careers, getting that quality time to nourish the relationship can be difficult. Quality time is being there for the person physically and mentally. It is not just watching your favorite TV program together because your eyes are both fixated on the TV. It is when you turn the TV off, talking and looking at each others eyes, learning and discovering new things about the other. It is when you stop with what you are doing because you want to listen to what your spouse wants to share or show to you. It is about FOCUSING on them. I listen to my husband's stories at work. We tell jokes a lot. You can talk about childhood for example. One thing I do for my spouse is I make sure I welcome him home from work when I hear his car pull up in the drive way. A QT person loves alone time with you and your undivided attention.

Receiving Gifts

Some people are born givers, that is how they express love and care for people. They give gifts because they went somewhere and suddenly "thought" about you. Gifts are visual expression of love. I love you written on post-it on your fridge, a love letter, flowers freshly picked from the garden, a dinner date for no reason at all---means so much to a person whose primary love language is receiving gifts. Whether it is a hand made card or a fancy diamond earings, find things that you think your spouse will enjoy and you are comfortable buying. It's the thought that counts!

Hubby came home from work the other day trying to recall the song he heard on the radio. Last night, he finally remembered what it was and posted it on my facebook wall.

He would bring home flower/s from work, just bcoz....

Acts of Service

When the not so tidy person married the finicky one.....This is when "actions speaks louder than words" comes in. Nagging happens when an act of service is neglected. Women dont need prompting on this one, I think this comes out naturally. We can even do acts of service in our sleep! A wife can sometimes feel un-appreciated and taken for granted because hubby do not pay attention to the love language she is speaking. He stands there scratching his head wondering what you are complaining about. A tidy house, aroma of food, or treats in the oven, makes a man a happy-husband. A massage before bed sounds good for a wife, or even offering to wash the dishes. It takes a while to learn how to speak this language specially when your spouse is OC(obssessive compulsive.....crazy clean!!!) but you have to go an extra mile. So watch out for those HINTS!

Physical Touch

Physical touch does not mean "lets go to the room...*wink wink*". They said 7 touches a day makes a person healthy. Touching is a therapy! Watch at how children do this if you do not know how to speak this language. A rub on the back, a tickle, cuddling on the couch, hold hands in the car or bump his hip as you pass by him, there are countless ways on how you express "touch". Last night I was measuring my hand on hubby's hand, his foot and mine. Sometimes I would ride on his back and have him take me to the spice in the kitchen I cant reach. If this is your primary love language and not your spouse's, TEACH HIM!